Waiting! I hate Waiting!!

It’s funny how sometimes you don't feel up to getting out of bed and going to church but when you force yourself you always are happy you did. Mostly because you feel the sermon was written just for you. Well I had that today! We had a visiting Pastor who spoke on Genesis 16:1- 16. I have never looked at or heard these verses explained like this before. Waiting! We all hate waiting! In these verses Sarah and Abram are waiting on the Lord to fulfill a promise that He would give them a child. But frustration set in and Sarah ends up taking things into her own hands. A lot of times when we become impatient and come up with our own plan the consequences can be devastating and have lasting consequences. We are still seeing the consequences to Sarah’s decision today. God has a purpose a plan and He will fulfill it in His perfect time. Not ours. We so often blame God…  Why hasn't God given me a baby yet? Why hasn't He chosen to heal me yet? I know God has a plan and a purpose for me and I am trusting in Him that He will be glorified in it. I’m praying that I don't become impatient (although I have at times) but that I continue to give this back to God, relinquishing what little control I think I have. He is the one that is in control, I just have to remember that. (lol)

On Friday May 31^st I am heading into the civic for my pre-op for my surgery, I'm hoping to hear from Dr. Chow’s office tomorrow or Tuesday as to a date for my surgery. I'll keep you all posted. Mike and I have prayed continuously that God would give me continued progress (which He has) and that He would make things clear to us as we go along this journey. We have been looking into our housing situation although our current house has been adapted a little for me it’s not something that will work long term. We are looking into bungalows and or building. Please be in prayer that God would reveal to us as to what’s best for our whole family.  Thank you for all your continued support, encouragement, love and most of all your prayers. 

BIG HUG Sandra

Go SENS Go ....NOT!

Go SENS Go. Well I can't say that I have been cheering them on. My surgery got postponed because they made the playoffs.  Dr. Chow my surgeon is also the Ottawa Senators doctor and had to postpone my surgery in order to travel and be available for them.  At first I was a little upset, I had myself mentally prepared and had started to get things organized at home for that date. But I understand that this has been in God’s hands from the start and He must have something up His sleeve.  So I have to trust that this is the right thing and I will have my surgery when it’s His perfect time.

It’s hard to believe that Mother’s Day is just a few days away which will mark my one year anniversary of my accident.  A lot has happened in this year. God continues to give me my daily supply of grace. There have definitely been some hard days and not so hard days. I pray with expectation knowing that God can heal me; I pray that He chooses to glorify Himself in this way.  Until that day I pray that He will continue to give me the strength, that He would reveal Himself to me every morning carrying me through that day. I pray that He will continue to go before me, walk beside me and to give Mike and I the wisdom and discernment needed in our thoughts and decisions.   God has worked a miracle in allowing me to see Dr. Chow and for me to be able to have my surgery as quickly as I am and I know that He will continue.  

I am continuing to do Physio twice a week; I go on my bike five times a week along with a list of other things to help keep me healthy through this process. I want to make sure that I am doing my part so that God can do His. I was reading a book and in it they said to Pray as though it was up to God and work as though it was up to you.  I’m ready! Now I just have to wait on Him and for His perfect timing to heal me completely.
Wishing all you mom’s out there a Happy Mother’s Day.
Big Hug Sandra

Open Doors!

From the beginning Mike and I have always prayed that God would make it obvious to us, as to what we need to do regarding my situation. When we were looking at having physiotherapy in the United States we asked God to open and or close doors to what we needed to do. If you remember He did just that He closed the doors to 2 possibilities leaving us with Detroit being the obvious option.

Well we have been praying concerning my back as my pain since Christmas has been progressively getting worse. I thought maybe this is something I would just have to learn to live with but as I talked about it to my physiotherapist here in Ottawa and others I started to investigate as to what I should do. I heard of an orthopedic surgery, Dr. Don Chow and thought it would be great if I could get into see him. I found out that it is a long wait to see him just for a consult. This past Wednesday Mike was speaking with our dear friend Carol, who has worked at the Civic Hospital for years and knows Dr. Chow personally was able to speak with him and through there special relationship, Dr. Chow agreed to see me Friday morning.

After reviewing my original X-rays Dr. Chow feels that the rods that were placed in my back are causing the pain and is recommending that I have them removed. He also wants to have a neurological exam done and current x-rays to see if there are any cracks or breaks in the rods. As we left the examining room everyone that we needed to see and book these appointments with were standing just outside the door.

My exam was booked for Tuesday at 7:30am, x-rays just after and my post op paper work was completed just after that. Dr. Chow met with us again on Tuesday morning to review the surgery and any all questions that Mike and I had.

We prayed for OPEN DOORS…. Once again God just didn't open the door He blew the hinges off.
In less than a week I met with the surgeon had all the test that I need to have done, done and I am now booked for my surgery on May 22nd.

Depending on what Dr. Chow sees when he gets in there will depend on the extent of the surgery. He is hoping to remove all the rods and screws and a piece of the T5-disc that is sticking out. It should last anywhere from 1–4 hours. We are hoping that I won’t be in hospital longer than 1 week with a 6 week recovery. 

 
Although I am excited to reduce my pain I do have some fear about undergoing surgery. There can always be complications and risks involved. The normal risks of undergoing surgery but the biggest is more loss of function. This is very low risk but yet still a risk. It’s scary to have to undergo the recovery again. The fear of the unknown but now also the known. God gives us so many promises to cling to.

Psalm 46:1 “God is our refuge and strength. Always ready to help in times of trouble” This journey has not been easy but daily I try to give the day over to God and rest in Him for what I need for the day. I continue to pray daily that God would reveal His glory and power through healing me completely.

Mark 11:24 “Therefore I tell you, what ever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours.” I believe it! Please continue to pray with me for my complete healing, for the coming weeks as we prepare and get ready for the surgery and for the recovery. Pray for the girls and for Mike as well as life is about to change again for them. Praise, that God is a God of power that can open doors!

Hugs Sandra

Day by Day

Yes...we are still here! Sorry it's been awhile. Thank you for always checking in and for your continued prayer...lots to keep praying over.

 After our trip to Mexico and getting back to our routine, we have made some decisions on the near future. We have decided it would benefit our family for us to stick closer to home for a while. To that end I now have my FES Bike and Standing Frame at home and have established a full routine both on my own and with my Physio Therapists twice weekly. I am making great progress on my FES Bike. Just after 2 weeks I find that my muscles are strengthening and it's helping to reduce swelling and my toning. I am "riding" up to 16 KM - 4-5 times a week!

I am continuing with acupuncture once a week. I am not sure what it's doing for me, but even though I dread it...its very uncomfortable...we feel I need to continue it for now. Things are happening and although we aren't sure we can attribute it the acupuncture we aren't sure it's not.

One of my biggest struggles is the "sitting and watching" that I am forced to do. I find it very difficult to sit and watch people do things for me. I am so grateful for all the giving, loving people in my life but really miss being able to do for others and even for myself. It goes completely against my nature and I am waiting for God to show me how to do this well.

People ask me and my family members constantly if there has been "any change". I am noticing that my sense of feeling seems to have reached further below my level of injury. It's faint but I am definitely aware of it when concentrating.
Something I have been needing and asking God for was something to show me progress and re-fuel my hope. During my physio sessions my therapist lift me to a standing position at my kitchen counter. The biggest challenge so far has been being able to hold my knees in a locked position. Once this was achieved we moved onto developing weight transfer and then using my hip flex-ors and gluts’ to activate movement.

This past Tuesday I was able to translate all that into actual "voluntary movement".

We have attached a video for you to see, but want to make it clear that although this is definitely progress, I am not feeling what is happening here. I am activating this muscle movement through a great deal of concentration & effort and as you can see it still lacks control. I am taking this as a positive sign and gift from God. This is movement below my injury level and that is amazing!

 Please continue to pray for complete healing and that my muscles will continue to react favourably. Also, for our day-to-day decision making. Hugs Sandra

Hola!!

So we made it back in the wee hours Sunday morning. Life is back to the full swing, work, meetings, Dr's appointments, etc..... We had a great time in Mexico, good friends, food and oh yes maid service with a choclate on my pillow at night pretty easy to get used to. Sandra's flight was interesting, it was booked before her acciedent so we didn't think it was a big deal for her and Emily to go on one flight, Jules and I took the milk run. Sandra and Emily arrived in Mexico only to realize that they are being dropped off in the middle of the tarmac with a full flight of stairs to get down. The lack of regulation worked to our benefit as a few mexican's just picked her up and carried her down. I'm thinking in Canada their may have been a few union and safety rules broken but it all worked our and just added to the adventure. Sandra is doing great on her FES bike, doing approximentally 10 miles/per day hopefully 4-5 times per week. It is a great workout for her, gets her heart rate, muscles going. We have our times where one of us is more positive than the other but I guess that is the beauty of marriage, we are truly there for each other and we will get through. Mike

Better news

Well yes last week was a difficult week, we always go hoping and praying for new gains, but they aren't always there. It was pointed out to me that we should be looking at more then the assessments, maybe look at real world improvements and yes Sandra has had a lot of improvements over the last few months. Mostly core improvements as she doesn't have to support herself with her arms when driving on an on ramp, and just transferring into her van, bed etc... Are all much improved, Yesterday I went with Sandra to her actupuncture appointment, it appears she is having more light touch feelings on her lower back. This is always hard to judge but improvements seam to be happening. Friday we are heading out of town away from the snow. Please pray for safe travels and our condo is as accessible as they say it is( always makes us a little nervous)Have a great spring break!! Mike

We are home

Well we just got in, it was a "fun" drive, about 4 extra hours including a detour to do a dealer trade in Toronto, so all in all not too bad. It was a difficult assessment this time, we didn't see any measurable progress since the last assessment. It is very frustrating and discouraging as we continue to look for even the smallest improvements. Mike